Are you tired of having the same arguments?
Are you ready to try something new?
Are you looking for meaningful conversation, deep connection, and less conflict in your relationship?
Conscious Communication Skills can help!
For people in committed relationships who care about their partner,
but feel discouraged, disillusioned, or disconnected.
A Couples Communication Coaching session with Miles will teach you how to:
• Express your feelings and needs honestly, without blame
• Hear your partner without judgment
• Make decisions together that include both of your needs
• Establish healthy boundaries
• Care for yourself, while caring about your partner
• Increase intimacy, while maintaining independence
$300/3-hour session - $100/hour for Skype sessions
How does it work?
In Couples Communication Coaching, the focus is on how you communicate with each other, especially when one or both of you are emotionally charged. Miles will explain the basics of effective communication and facilitate conversations between you about any current issues that you need to discuss.
Coaching is different from traditional therapy in that you do most of the talking directly with each other. The coach directs the process, but not the content of your conversations. The goal is that you have support to talk through difficult issues while gaining skills that you can take home and use on your own.
Miles does not offer solutions to your conflicts, but teaches you a process that you can apply to any difficult conversation. He will help you to be aware of your unconscious habits, and will show you how to use Conscious Communication Skills to meet your needs, while supporting your partner in meeting their needs.
These skills are easy to learn yet difficult to apply because most of us automatically defer to our habitual way of thinking about conflict in terms of right and wrong. This sets you up for competition, power struggle, and chronic tension, and makes it more difficult to collaborate and connect.
To break out of habitual patterns, most people need the support of a teacher and coach in the beginning. A skilled coach can offer specific directions to each of you individually, during live conversations with your partner in confidential, private sessions. If you are willing to put some time, effort, and resources into your relationship, you can learn to use these skills to build a stable and satisfying bond between you.
Miles spent ten years as a professional divorce mediator and realized that if he could teach couples to use the same listening, assertion and negotiation skills before they split up, a lot of shipwrecked marriages might be saved. He has worked with couples since 1990 helping people who don't feel understood to assert themselves responsibly, while also listening supportively.
Some couples resolve multiple issues in one session. Others may work through one topic for an entire weekend. Sessions are three hours long, and you can come for a single session or book a 2-night retreat including two sessions. One session or private retreat may be enough for you to learn how to stay connected, however, most couples see the need for follow up sessions in order to make these new habits stick. Either way, the goal is for you to learn how to use the skills on your own.
What Good Will It Do?
.....or How can I interest my partner?
If you trust the process, commit to the work, and learn to use the tools, you can realize deeper intimacy and greater autonomy. This work will help you acknowledge and process difficult emotions, make decisions together that include both of your needs, and have challenging conversations that bring you closer together instead of further apart.
You will learn how to take care of your own feelings and needs, while helping your partner take care of theirs. You will begin to view your relationship as an opportunity for personal growth and increased self-awareness, as well as for comfort and security. And you will become allies with your partner, instead of adversaries.